Lightlark by Alex Aster

Synopsis & Disclaimer

 

Lightlark is an island that appears among the six newlands every hundred years, after it had been cursed 500 years prior. Nobody knows the origin of the curse, although one of the six rulers is a suspect. Therefore, every century there is a Centennial held for one hundred days where rulers of the six realms come together to try and break the curse based on a prophecy. 

 

I do not bother being spoiler-free for books which I am convinced will waste your time and money should you read them. This is one of those books. 

 

Do yourself a favour. Don’t waste your money. Idk, go read Punk 57 instead. At least it’ll make you feel something. 

 

Review

 

I purchased this book simply because I had seen it floating around the world of BookTok, and also a little because I followed Aster on Instagram and she looked like the prettiest and youngest writer I had ever seen. Appearances are deceptive, and I have been played. I don’t follow her on Instagram anymore, nor will I ever read another book she writes. And that decision was before I discovered all the controversies of her and her millionaire self-made sister online. I still don’t understand how this book was so widely marketed, even on the screen in Times Square. It makes everything look far too blatantly like a lie. A book like this is, in my humblest opinion, unworthy of even being hyped on TikTok, except if it is by 7 year-olds. 

Anyhow, I digress. 

 

Lightlark reads like an author’s first novel, even though it is most certainly not Aster’s first novel. You can thus imagine my surprise when I discovered she already has 2 published works. I wonder how she writes on this level of debutante. A UPenn summa cum laude graduate? The same university where Elon Musk graduated? Really? To me that just taints the university’s reputation. 

 

Again, I digress. I suppose I’m just extraordinarily befuddled. 

 

Aside from the tacky writing, the entire plotline read as though Aster accidentally got her first draft published. Every major ‘foreboding’ we get of a certain character is entirely based on the MC’s hunches. For instance, the explanation of why she thinks the King wants her alive is mere speculation. We haven’t seen anything that would push us to think that the King is malicious in any way, except for Isla’s general mistrust of virtually everyone, and that’s what is used as the basis for suspense throughout the chapters. There is never anything concrete that would lead the reader themselves to come to a certain conclusion. And often it feels like Aster spells out the obvious, as though her target audience is supposed to be 7 year-olds. Though, in this time, even 7 year-olds are smart enough not to need the obvious stated to them. 

 

The plot twist, if you can even call that a plot twist, was mid at best. It was far too obvious that Celeste was evil. The friendship felt flimsy from the get-go. 

 

Also, it feels like Aster has given zero thought to naming the characters and everything else. Moonlings? Sunlings? Skyling? What? Moonlings got the Moon Isle of the Lightlark Island? No kidding. Ex-Wildlings to refer to those who have shunned their kind? Cringe. There was no originality to it in my opinion. World building 0. 

 

As for character building, Aster needs some lessons. The men are basically described as giants, which is not attractive at all. Why is it such a trend for fictional men to be ‘huge’ with ‘massive hands’, ‘the broadest shoulders’? What in the damnest Hell are you describing? A troll? Grimshaw and Oro inspired zero feelings in me as a reader. 

 

Isn’t it funny how Isla has been trained to withstand virtually anything, any kind of pain even, and yet they hadn’t thought to train her for the most basic thing: eating hearts. That’s what her people are KNOWN for, yet she has no experience in it.

Okay, but WHAT was that pathetic demonstration of her powers? Knockin off a king’s crown blindfolded???? Tf???? I got second hand embarrassment from that. 

 

The mirror that shows your fear though- stealer much? Harry potter what was the name of that mirror. There were other instances where the scenes were far too obviously appropriated from the Harry Potter series.

 

There’s so much that feels out of place. Like after the pairing when the king came to her quarters and she was dressed like a 21st century normal human girl in a baggy t shirt and the “comfiest” pants? Maybe Aster should stick to exploring writing YA novels. Fantasy isn’t her forte at all. 

 

The “Grim grinned” unsettled me so much. for a summa cum laude graduate, I’d think she knew more words to describe a smile, however wicked, than “grinned”, which has been used far too many times.

 

Also, so what if he erased her memories omg shes so f dramatic 

 

Ugh, what a bore and disappointment of a book.

 

Also, what is the game? Like, I was waiting for something. All I got is lame ‘show offs’, if you can even call it that of the leader’s powers. 

BORING.

I'd give you a zero if I could, but I can't, so I give you....a one.

Toodles, ugh.